If there was a way that I could
go back in time to give myself advice when I was a young mother I would have a long list of things to say.
Of course most of it would be
advice older mothers had already told me:
- Enjoy your children while they're young because they grow up too fast.
- Always treat your family as well as you would a guest.
- Play more.
- Keep a record of the unimportant moments as well as the important ones (I really wish I would have done that!)
- Children can be taught how to do their own laundry.
- Be in the moment.
- Don't rush through the infant and toddler stages.
- Be patient when it comes to potty training---especially when it takes longer than you think.
- Breath
- Every moment does not need to be planned.
- Elaborate vacations and fancy birthday parties are not requirements for a happy childhood.
- A big empty box is more fun than most toys you can buy.
- Prayer and faith are essential in raising children.
- Take time to step back and see your child as the person he/she is becoming.
- Broken things can be replaced, broken hearts cannot.
- Buy a panini maker.
Okay, I know that last one may seem a little odd. But a couple of years ago, when I purchased a panini maker, my life became easier.
Every Saturday became
panini night. Everyone makes their own meal to suit their taste, there is no more asking, "Mooommmmm, what's for dinner tonight???" And even though my younger self would have reminded me that panini makers were not readily available at the time I would have quickly answered, "Then find a meal that your family can enjoy weekly, that can be customized to fit individual taste and that can be
a weekly mini-celebration, a night to look forward to for mom and the family." If panini's are not your family's thing then maybe sub sandwiches, crepes, waffles, burgers, or salads could become your
weekly ritual.
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Of course most of it would be advice older mothers had already told me:
Every Saturday became panini night. Everyone makes their own meal to suit their taste, there is no more asking, "Mooommmmm, what's for dinner tonight???" And even though my younger self would have reminded me that panini makers were not readily available at the time I would have quickly answered, "Then find a meal that your family can enjoy weekly, that can be customized to fit individual taste and that can be a weekly mini-celebration, a night to look forward to for mom and the family." If panini's are not your family's thing then maybe sub sandwiches, crepes, waffles, burgers, or salads could become your weekly ritual.
17 comments:
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That is the advice I'd tell myself.
PAT
I would tell my self to Slow Down!
accept help.
thanks for your advice. i am have a two year old little girl and all of your advice is applicable.
my advice to myself - it's okay to say no.
This is a wonderful list!! Even though my youngest is only 5 and my oldest is only 12 I must say I am already missing those innocent baby/toddler years when you were their world....
"This too shall pass." It would have saved me much stress if I could have remembered that and truly believed it.
I'd say to find time for fun even if it meant dirty dishes in the sink and dust bunnies under the furniture.
Wow! I think you were inspired to write this post FOR ME. Today especially. My two boys ages 3 and 1 bounce off the walls pretty much all day every day and sometimes I think to myself, "I don't know if I can ever have anymore kids because these two make me crazy and if I don't pay really close attention I'm going to ruin them." lol. May sound dramatic but it how I feel sometimes. I'm way to rigid in my parenting and I know it but the hard part is changing. I need to just RELAX and have more fun. And like one reader said remember that "this too shall pass".
I guess technically I'm still pretty young but I'd tell myself to have more fun and stop yelling. lol.
Do not take yourself so seriously!!
I'd tell myself to read Proverbs everyday and submit to the authority God had placed in my life when I was younger.
I would remind myself that God put hinges on bedroom doors for a reason and instead of fighting and yelling for them to keep their rooms clean (which they never did to my standard) I could just simply close the door instead and save everyone a ton of grief.
1. Teach your children to say "yes mam", "no mam", "yes sir" and "no sir".
2. Always answer your child's questions completely and honestly. Never tell them "you are too young to understand." If they are old enough to inquire, they are old enough to receive a truthful answer. Just make the answer age appropriate.
3. Always remember that you were a couple before you were a family and don't allow your relationship with each other to vanish as you focus on the kids.
4. Play outside with your family. It is not safe for children to play outside independently as we did in the 70s. But family bike rides, days at the park, hiking, etc are good for you and the kids.
5. Eliminate cell phones and earbuds from ALL family dinners whether at a restaurant or the family dinner table. Family dinners should be about sharing time with each other, not about texting and listening to music privately.
Finally, thank you Joy for sharing your life with us!
I would enjoy the toddler years more, and play more. I love your blog. It is the first one I started reading and I have loved it from day one. Please stop my blog creativesouthernhome.blogspot.com I have an award waiting for you.
Thank you for such great inspiration!
i feel like the time i am in my life, i can totally use the advice you gave now. tomorrow is a new day and i'm excited for it. thanks for this post. xoxo
A few things - I had the most delicious pannini yesterday in Manhattan - turkey BLT. Now, what would I say to my younger self? I am perfect exactly as I am and I don't need a man to have a sense of self-worth.
I agree with Anne! I miss my Little ones...
I would like to tell my younger self "not to stress so much, that things always work out for the best..."
Susan
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