Friday, August 17, 2012

Twenty Weeks


Twenty Weeks.

There have only been a few times in my life when I marked the passage of time by weeks. I did each time I was pregnant; counting the weeks as my belly expanded with the new life growing inside. Each week I anticipated how my life would be forever changed. It was a time of anxiety and happiness.

Now, with the passing of the life of my dear, sweet spouse I find myself counting the weeks again. Each week I anticipate how my life will be forever changed. It is a time of anxiety and sadness. And yet there is also happiness to be found.

It may seem strange to hear a new widow say that she is happy. But there really are times of happiness amongst the sadness and grief. Those happy times come when I realize how truly fortunate I am. I was blessed to marry to a very good man. He loved me and believed in me. He was a true partner in every sense of the word. He was my life partner and my blog partner. My husband was by my side as I purchased a digital camera so that I could begin this blog. He was there to help me build and make my plans and dreams a reality. Even when I swore him to silence, telling him that I didn’t want anyone to know about my blog because I wanted it to be something I did anonymously, he would secretly tell others because he couldn’t contain his pride in me. I recently went into where my husband worked and a young man asked about my blog. He said that my husband would always showoff my projects. That’s the kind of man he was. That’s the kind of man he still is. I have no doubt that he is saddened that I have taken such a long hiatus from blogging. I have felt his presence nudging me on just as he always did.

So my dear blog friends, today, twenty weeks after the sudden passing of my sweetheart, I return to blogging. My life has been forever changed. It may be noticeable in my future posts. But, in honor of Mr. Joys of Home and because I truly have missed you my friends, I am back.

I express to you my immense gratitude for your thoughts and prayers. My family and I are indeed lifted by you! Thank you for your comments and emails. I read and cherished each one and express my appreciation to you for taking the time to write. Please forgive me for not responding. I needed to take a break from blogging and emails to adjust and re-evaluate my life. I am grateful for your love, concern, and patience.

With the deepest of appreciation,

Joy

43 comments:

Deb and Blake said...

So sorry for your loss. I'm so glad you are back. Your blog buddies will continue lifting you up in prayer.

Deborah

Ceekay-THINKIN of HOME/Doublewide Decor said...

I am so glad you are back. I can only imagine how difficult this time is....but I thought of you often.
I hope your blog can bring some avenue of JOY back into your life!

Laura said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Those words are not enough. I wish you well in this changed reality. Blessings.

Brenda said...

So happy to see you back. I'm so sorry for your loss. Sweet blessings to you!

momstheword said...

I am glad you are back but so sorry for your loss!

There can never be anything wrong with finding something to laugh about or smile about in the midst of tragedy.

What a sweet, loving husband you were blessed with! I am so glad that you have your family and I imagine you see him every day in the faces of your children or hear his voice in the words of your sons. So glad you have family to walk this journey with you.

Heidi@TheMerryMagpieVintage said...

Joy, I've kept your blog in my reader and every time I see the name, I think of you and wonder how you're doing. I'm still so very sorry about your heartbreaking loss and wish you peace and strength.

Heather L. said...

Joy, I am so glad to see you back! I was thinking of you yesterday, in fact. I went back and checked to make sure I hadn't missed a post from you. I am so sorry about your husband. How proud he must be of you. Can't wait to see your new posts =)

The Kramer Angle said...

Welcome back! I'm sorry for the reason for your absence but I'm glad you decided to come back to the blog world. You've been missed!

Gail

Pam Mueller said...

So glad you are starting to find some joy in life again. I have missed your posts and hearing about your family. Thank goodness for the tender mercies of our Savior Jesus Christ and His gift so that you and your husband will be together again!

Kim Hughes said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can only imagine what you are going through.

I have to say that I realized tonight how much one blogger can learn from another. I appreciate you sharing your joys and sorrows with us. It helps others reflect on things on our own lives. Puts things in perspective.

I am a member of the church too and know that it won't be long before you and Mr. Joy can reflect together on your amazing life.

Keep creating!! You're fantastic!

joanne said...

my heart is smiling to see a post from you today. You and your family have been in my thoughts, prayers and heart since that day twenty weeks ago. Keep smiling dear ones, he is watching and walking this path with you. take care.

Kristine said...

Welcome Back Joy! The blogging world has missed you and your inspiration to the world. What a wonderful tribute to your Mr. Joy. Those we truly love are never far from us. Good luck with all your future endeavors! I look forward to seeing them unfold on your blog!

Lorie said...

So happy to see you back and I hope you continue to find those moments of joy and have peace in knowing your love is eternal!!

Terri said...

Welcome back, Joy!!! Your blogger friends have missed you!

THE Princess Bombshell* said...

YOU ARE LOVED! I have been waiting in anticipation to see you come up on my blog reader! YOU WERE MISSED! Sending a virtual HUG to you!!!!!!!!!!

Rachel Coplin said...

You make me smile. I love you and I'm excited to see this blog take life again. I miss him too but know he's psyched about this progress. Go joy!

Marie Antionette said...

Dear Joy,

My heart breaks for you and your family. You will be in our prayers for God's comfort and peace for you and your children.
You have a beautiful blog and I'm so happy you are going to come back to it. What better place to share your times of joy & sorrow. We're always here for you Joy.

Blessings & Hugs, Edie & Marie

Mimi said...

Oh I am so happy to see you back.... Each day I would see you on my favorite blog list and think about you. Life can be so hard at times. But today is a happy one cause your back.... May your heart heal as you go though each day. Blessings to you and your family <3

Susan and Mark said...

So glad to see you back. Writing has a way of helping us through tough times; I hope you find it helpful as you navigate this new life of yours.

I was widowed when I was barely 50. It's been 5 years now, and I totally understand about counting by weeks. That will change in time to months, and then-unbelievably-years.

Here is a website ( for the widowed among us) that helped me keep some of my sanity in those early times: www.ywbb.org/

Namaste :)

'T' said...

I have thought about you. I am so sorry for your loss. It's so good to hear from you. I will be looking forward to future posts; as will your husband. What a beautiful tribute to him. Families are truly forever, I've felt this throughout my life, as I know you passionately believe, too. ♥ T

9405018--Pat said...

Welcome back!!!!! This was a beautiful post today...hugs Pat H

Connie said...

I went to your blog to write a word of encouragement and here I found you are back. I enjoyed the pass posts and I know I will enjoy the future one as well. I am so glad to hear you are healed enough to begin blogging again. I don't know by experience the loss of a special loved one but I can only imagine what it means to go on with your life without your love beside your side. Keep looking up and I do look forward to hearing from you again. Take care.

Cynthia said...

I am so sorry for the loss of your spouse. I hope that you find support and healing through your blog. How blessed you were to have such a wonderful partner!

Michelle said...

Hugs to you. After my brother was killed 33 years ago I remember counting days...that came back to me as I read your post.

I know that grieving is a process and everyone grieves differently. If blogging helps you, do it. If not, then don't. You do what YOU need to do for YOU. AND that will probably change from time to time.

I have thought of you often this summer.
Hugs from Iowa,
Michelle
PS I have the word JOY in many,many places of my house (a reminder to be thankful). Some of my favorite Joy sayings are...find JOY, choose JOY, create JOY, the JOY of.... so naturally I have to read "Joys of Home"

Mely said...

I can denied, I cried when you posted about the loss of your husband. And today I got a little teary eyed for your strength to come back and blog again.

Still praying for you and your family
and looking forward to this new chapter.

Sending you a big hug.

Mely

Heather at Happy Chippy Junk said...

WElcome back!! You have been missed! Each time I click on your blog to chack for a new post I have wondered how you are!! Thank goodness for forever families!! May being creative help keep your heart mind and hands busy and displace the ache!!

Karen said...

Welcome back. You have been missed.

Angie said...

You are so lucky to have a beautiful love story like the one you shared with your husband. Those memories are yours forever. :)

Welcome back.

Hugs, Angie

Cottagecheap said...

I am so happy you are back! I am glad you are allowing the happy memories to help heal your wounded heart.
We missed you!
XO

melissa * 320 Sycamore said...

SO good to see Joys of Home in bold in my reader.Thank you for sharing your heart with us....welcome back, Joy!

marilynl said...

Welcome back. I hope blogging will be a source of happiness for you as you continue to heal. I have missed you.

Dawn said...

I have thought of you often and wondered if (hoped!) you'd come back to blogging. You were missed and I'm glad you've chosen to blog again. I am certain Mr. Joys of Home is proud of your determination to continue living the full life you created together!!!

LuAnn said...

Joy, I just wanted to let you know I stopped by your blog and have thought a lot about you, Ali and your family over the past few months. My prayers are with you.

LuAnn

loey said...

I've checked every day to see if you were back. I'm soooo happy to hear from you again. I have thought of you and your family often. Welcome back!!!

Nancy said...

Joy,
Everytime I visited during the these 20 weeks, which was almost daily, I said a prayer for you. There were times when I thought you were never coming back, though. Not only are you back, you are able to find some happiness. I'm sure Mr. Joys would be so proud of you. Welcome back!

JoAnne said...

I have thought about you often during these last 20 weeks and wondered how you were doing. I am so glad you are back!

Gayle said...

Welcome back Joy - I'm so glad your healing has started and that you feel well enough to continue sharing with us.

Sallie said...

Welcome back. I cannot imagine how hard it has been for you. I would check periodically, and still seeing " sorrow in our home " ....
would just pray for you and your family.

The Single Nester said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Two years ago I lost my only sibling, my brother, and it still pains me to this day. I found solace in God.

sharonavinger said...

So very sorry for your loss. Welcome back! So good to have you return to blogging.

Elena said...

I have not been blogging for a really long time, and not reading blogs for even longer. Today I finally decided to try to come back and saw your link on my side bar. After you receiving my whole "relief society email fiasco" I just thought I'd come and see your blog. I was so sorry to read of the passing of your husband. I hope you are finding much comfort and love as you get through this trial. Prayers and well wishes to you and your family from me.

Brittany said...

I am so very sorry to hear about yoru loss. I've been away all summer and haven't checked the blog. I debated expressing my condolences after so long, when you're likely just beginning to heal; I apologize for opening up the hurt. I hope you find a way to heal through your creativity, it's such a special gift you've been given!

Bettsi McComb said...

Welcome back, Joy. We missed you! I lost my husband suddenly too when I was 31. It does change your life in a big momentous way, but you know that you are so loved. By your family, by your husband in heaven, by our dear Lord and by all of us! I hope that love is a comfort to you.

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